Tag Archives: spirituality

Food for Thought: Pornography Destroyed My Life and Redeemed My Soul

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Lately, I’ve been reading articles concerning the damaging effects of pornography, how it deteriorates the traditional concept of human sexual behavior. I totally agree with the idea that addiction to pornography can cause a man/woman to devalue their opposite gender half to mere objects. I concur that too much fantasizing of “taboo” sexual fetishes (i.e. extramarital, incestual, pedophilia) with the assistance of pornography can cause a man/woman to withdraw themselves from reality to the point where they want to literally act out these taboo sexual fetishes in the material world. I understand that incessant consumption of pornography effectively appropriates the creativity of the man/woman, rendering him/her unproductive to the betterment and the evolution of humanity and life itself.

That last part right there lies the dilemma not necessarily for humanity as a whole, but for the individual melanated human.

Humans are constantly programmed from birth to be productive members of society. This has been the case since time immemorial when humanity became the dominant species on earth. A soul that is incarnated (or incarcerated) within a human body has voluntarily subjected themselves to this exploitation. The soul is pure sexual energy, and that same energy force is used to bring creativity and meaning to every fabric of the illusionary material world. Thus, a soul that is asleep becomes a battery for the cult of humanity to create a world that can secure its survival, no matter how fruitless the attempt. Not to mention, the human brain operates as a biological “matrix” designed to further entrap the soul by shielding the pineal gland (aka the “antenna of the anti-gods”) from the real unseen world.

The illusionary material world does not need any more new ideas, innovation, new arts, etc., etc., etc. At this point in time, it is in the best interest of melanated humans who have souls to stop exploiting themselves in the interest of maintaining their attachment to the material realm. No matter how noble the endeavor may be to save the material world from dissolution, in the end, their attachment to it has to DIE. The soul, an infinite energy source that was not created and cannot be destroyed, is not of this material universe. It wants OUT of the illusion. These are, indeed, the “end times:” the time to let go of temporal personas and existence as a whole.

The human body cannot fully comprehend or express the sexual nature of the soul. The human body would instantly combust if the full manifestation of the soul was allowed to be unleashed. Thus, there have been various systems and industries established over thousands of years by elitist entities to siphon the divine spark from souls mainly incarnated within melanated humans for the continuation of the humanity cult and the material world as a whole. All fields of education, art and entertainment, trade and commerce were originally created to uphold that status quo. Which is why sex is still such a taboo topic amongst the masses, especially sex that is simply for pleasure and doesn’t lead to reproduction (because how can the material world continue to exist if ignorant souls don’t find themselves back here through the reincarnation cycle?) In spite of the heavily sexualized marketization and advertisement in today’s modern world, sexual repression runs rampant among the common man and woman.

Which brings me back to the “damaging” effects of pornography I mentioned previously.

(Full Disclosure: Yes, I like watching pornography. I love the coitus act with all the glory of its grotesqueness and crudeness (minus anal sex, not a big fan, another topic for another day.) And my most preferable copulation occurrence is between a Black-melanated man and a Black-melanated woman, especially when it’s done with sincere sensuality and intimacy. In my honest opinion, the sexual communion between souls trapped in melanated human avatars is the only valid sexual communion on the face of the earth. I like my Black-melanated women big-boned, just like what would imagine the essence of the  Great Mother/the Divine Feminine would like in the physical…a thick Black-melanated woman with big voluptuous titties, a nice-sized pillow-soft ass, and a fat juicy black hole of a pussy that can make the most powerful and visions of the gods humble before her throne.)

The etymology of the term pornography is “(one) depicting prostitutes, prostitute, originally ‘bought, purchased’, to sell.” Of course, one would think that a man or woman watching pornography is helping to facilitate the act of prostitution as we have been TRAINED to perceive what prostitution traditionally to be. Yet, a man or woman watching pornography is being “prostituted” of their soul’s energy force for the benefit of entities who need it to survive. So, you shouldn’t watch the filth, correct? Let’s not be hypocritical here.

What if we expanded the definition of prostitution beyond the act of selling just sexual intercourse?

In that case, humanity has been selling itself out in some form or fashion since forever and a day to secure its survival as a species. There are infinite examples over the history of mankind that can be pointed out to prove that point. On a deeper level, the souls of melanated humans have been unknowingly (and sometimes knowingly depending on a soul’s incarnation) prostituted since the dawn of Creation to sustain creation as we know it. That’s why it’s said that prostitution is the oldest profession on the planet. It is the core of the human condition.

Yes, heavy consumption of pornography does numb your brain matrix, basically turning you into a mindless zombie. You can spend hours a day mesmerized by the amount of flesh and fetishes to your liking online, wasting your time. You should use your time improve your life and utilize your resources on more positive activities that are geared toward that improvement, right?

Why are you so concerned about improving on a life experience that is finite and neverlasting?

The lives we build through our human avatars is a defense mechanism to protect our fragile ego personas as we move around within the material world. We build these life narratives to bring meaning to these fragile ego personas instead of facing the reality that it is all a lie. The ego is supposed to work in service of the soul, not the other way around.

Has pornography destroyed my life? Yes, it has destroyed the life narrative that served the interests of my ego persona. The lie I told myself, that I was a good son, a good husband, a good father, a decent human being who was a productive member of society worthy of redemption. You can’t redeem something that never existed in the first place. My soul is the only thing that is real about me, it was redeemed when I accepted the fact that I am a sexual deviant at my core.

Does that mean I should express every part of my deviancy while I’m here in the material world?

It’s OK if you have a sexual fetish you are aroused by that tends to cause ostracization when manifested within the boundaries of the human condition. Nevertheless, from what I have witnessed so far in this incarnation, it is not prudent nor wise to express every imaginative thought, especially those relating to sexual fantasies, in the material world. The material world is based on order, not the chaos that the soul originates from. Some fantasies should be left in the realm of the unmanifested. That’s where the term balance comes into play.

You have to find your Eros in the simplicity of just being ALIVE and AWAKENED. That means possessing a soul that is fully aware of the condition it finds itself in and has the ability to practice restraint when it wants to give up all of its energy force in exchange for the opportunity to create an impermanent paradise in the material world. A soul that realizes that it is PARADISE encased within a human cocoon for a brief period of time until the time has come to be reborn again as a majestically divine butterfly.

So what if pornography causes me to objectify women’s bodies! The melanated female human form is the most divinely beautiful image in the material world, worthy enough to bamboozle me into reincarnating back into this illusion just to be mesmerized by it all over again. You objectify the female body long enough you won’t help but to break through the superficiality of life and into the mysteries of divine feminine, if your soul is ALIVE and AWAKENED.

I’ve learned more about the mysteries of life through my “porn addiction” than I have through my attempted abstinence from it. My attempt to subdue these primal urges made me realize the true unfiltered nature of my soul, that it is neither good or bad, nor does it need to be reformed whatsoever. It is a love so unhinged and chaotic, to comprehend it any further would do it no justice. Any life I have acceptable by societal morals and values keeps the beast from being unleashed.

Therefore, you have the existence of vices. The vice you have doesn’t have to be a gambling kick, a drug habit, an addiction to sex and/or pornography, or anything with a negative connotation. It can be diet that makes you feel good about your body, watching TV or even reading a book, attending social gatherings such as a party or a concert that gives that high of human togetherness, or even frequently traveling the world just to break up the monotony of your existence. All of these vices work the same, it gives you the opportunity to escape the mundaneness and remain somewhat sane in this illusionary madhouse. Everyone has their thang to get them through.

Look, I’m not trying to tell you to change your moral code or that it is OK to act a plum fool with whatever vice you have. What I am saying is that your actions to survive and build on your ego persona contradict the nature and true intentions of your soul. Your soul does not want to be conflicted with restriction by its human condition for all eternity. Your soul’s attachment to humanity must come to an end at some point.

How many incarnations does it take to break that attachment? It varies from soul to soul.

What if a soul WANTS to play in this material world indefinitely? I’m pretty sure that’s happening with a lot of souls.

I don’t think my soul falls in the category though lol.

Expressed through Killah Khaos

(Side Note 1: Check out the 1986 H.P. Lovecraft-influenced film From Beyond. It will give a clearer understanding of the hidden sexual essence tied to the pineal gland.)

(Side Note 2: People try to separate the terms erotica and pornography. Pornography is considered more explicit and exploitative, whereas erotica (the literature and visual art form of sex) is based on a story narrative. Erotica attempts to dress up the repulsive and raw aesthetics of the act of coitus behind a veil of elegance; pornography gives it to you straight with no chaser. Erotica is just as exploitative as pornography because of the narrative aspect where half-truths and straight-up lies are told to make the act of coitus more appealing than it really is. There isn’t much of a difference; either both should be called erotica or pornography. Since both forms arouse the spirit of Eros, I prefer erotica. That’s just my two cents.)

Food for Thought: The Hidden Meaning of the prefix “Anti-“

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[Etymology of Anti-]

[word-forming element of Greek origin meaning “against, opposed to, opposite of, instead,” shortened to ant- before vowels and -h-, from Old French anti- and directly from Latin anti-, from Greek anti (prep.) “over, against, opposite; instead, in the place of; as good as; at the price of; for the sake of; compared with; in opposition to; in return; counter-,” from PIE *anti “against,” also “in front of, before” (from root *ant– “front, forehead,” with derivatives meaning “in front of, before”), which became anti- in Italian (hence antipasto) and French. It is cognate with Sanskrit anti “over, against,” and Old English and- (the first element in answer). A common compounding element in Greek, in some combinations it became anth- for euphonic reasons. It appears in some words in Middle English but was not commonly used in English word formations until modern times. In a few English words (anticipate, antique) it represents Latin ante. In noun compounds where it has the sense of “opposed to, opposite” (Antichrist, anti-communist) the accent remains on the anti-; in adjectives where it retains its old prepositional sense “against, opposed to,” the accent remains on the other element (anti-Christian, anti-slavery).]

    According to traditional wisdom, to be “anti” towards someone or something is to be in opposition to that someone or that something. For example, when an activist says they are anti- establishment, they are saying they are opposed to any form of a civilizational system that thrives in today’s society. When a man or woman declares they are anti- marriage, it can be assumed that that man or woman are against not only marital bonds cosigned by government entities but also committal to any form of an intimate relationship, especially in this day and age of jaded lovers. 

This type of mindset thrives in opposition. Opposition creates division & separation. Division & separation lives in a world of duality. The more you shed the illusions of life realities, the more you become closer to the true reality of existence, that everything is connected on the metaphysical unseen realm. This is when you began to return to the non-duality mindset that you once dwelled in prior to incarnating on the physical plane and in various instances in you early childhood prior to teen adolescence.

The differences you see in your everyday comings and goings with your two human eyes could simply be game (or stage play) elements to keep you engaged in the never-ending back and forth between “good and evil” (or to be real with you, the battle between survival and extinction.) Or those same elements could be an opportunity to observe that back and forth with an active pineal gland (aka “first eye,” “mind’s eye”, “the Antenna of the Ancient Ones”) to where you began to realize the beautiful folly of those machinations and return back to your original self, made anew.

Take for instance, the term AntiChrist.

Modern Christians are taught that the AntiChrist is the adversary to the Christ (and when I say Christ, I am referring to a spiritual consciousness, not Jesus, the purported human messiah.) It is assumed that AntiChrist is evil in nature and seeks to destroy mankind. And that title has been misapplied to many controversial figures in recent history i.e. Satan, Napoleon, Hitler, Donald Trump. If you have duality mindset, of course you could think that way; most modern popular religions operate as such. Yet, if you refer to the section within the etymological definition of anti- that is highlighted in bold and notated once more below:

(from root *ant– “front, forehead,” with derivatives meaning “in front of, before”)

…it is possible that the original definition of anti- changed over time, whether intentional or unintentional. It now fits an agenda to confuse and scare the masses into mindless obedience to an outdated & misconstrued religious doctrine. The AntiChrist is not the adversary to the Christ. It is the standard state of consciousness every melanated human being has when it incarnates onto the physical earth, a consciousness ignorant to the unseen and to its original self (the soul, the inner “son”/sun.) It can be good or evil, or both, whatever fits its aim. It is only a lie in its nature due to the fact that it cannot exist beyond that physical earth. From that description, the AntiChrist could serve as a euphemism for the human ego (the human avatar/representative for the soul), and the Christ is the soul. Yet again, the AntiChrist and the Christ are not adversaries, the soul and the ego are not adversaries as well.

The relationship between the AntiChrist and the Christ is akin to the chrysalis process (soul “death”, or sleep, in a human shell) that a caterpillar undergoes to become a butterfly. Regardless of its actions and conscious state as a caterpillar and encased within the chrysalis pod, it will transform into a butterfly once the process is complete (life outside the human shell.) The kind of butterfly a soul becomes depends on the level of consciousness it achieves in an incarnation.

It takes a level of skill attained through multiple reincarnations to achieve Christ consciousness. And plus, it is not necessary to attain Christ consciousness as a human, because all souls will shed its ignorance in death. A soul could choose not to reincarnate back into physical realm if its sufficiently satisfied. For the select few of souls who choose to undergo multiple reincarnations to attain Christ consciousness within their human shells, they serve as the nuclei, the light for lost souls to guide them back home to the Source (or Great Mother.) On the physical plane, the one is many; in the realm of the unseen, the many is one!

Other vital words with the prefix Anti-:

Antimatter: is not the antithesis to matter. Antimatter is chaos (khaos.) It was before matter, realm of the unseen, the free radical state of eternal primordial darkness (melanin.) It is the foundation of condensed chaos (order, matter.)

Antiquity: traditionally classified as ancient times, it is the age before the current age, or the foundation of the current age.

AntiGod: is a chaos being/entity or free soul not incarnated (or incarcerated) in the confines of human matter. A soul incarcerated in human matter will operate in the nature of a G.O.D. (Generator, Operator, Destroyer)

Ant(e)bellum: traditionally meaning “before the war”, it is the age before a soul incarnates onto the physical plane. The war age begins once a soul incarnates into matter (flesh) and must subdue its human representative (ego) enough to raise its consciousness level to see through the folly of existence.

Expressed Through Killah Khaos